HOUSEWORK
Who invented housework I would so like to know
If I could find the person my feelings I would show
I could say with sincerity that washings not my scene
I boiled my curtains in the wash my sheets came out bright green
My husband’s sweater I did wash which wasn’t very wise
When he tried it on today it was only half the size.
When it comes to washing up the dishes and the crocks
I have to hide the broken fragments in a cardboard box
I use that special liquid they show us on the tele
By mistake the other day I used it in the jelly
After eating a plate full the doctor called at home
He couldn’t even find me through a multitude of foam
I cooked a three course dinner for us the other night
I took a look at my pals face and saw a dreadful sight
I thought the soup as lovely something of which to shout
I didn’t know the idea was to take the oxtail out.
We had potatoes in their jackets I knitted them to fit
I didn’t know you cooked them bare I simply have no wit.
Polishing the furniture is not a chore I like
I’d really be far happier riding on my bike
I dust around my knickknacks I picked one up today
The head came off a figurine I was lost for what to say
I just ignore the cobwebs until there is no gap
They are in fact so useful nasty flies for them to trap.
Now bed makings another task that really drives me crazy
I only pull the covers up I’m hopeless and I’m lazy
My vacuum helps me quite a bit it has a lot of suction
It sucked our budgie up the tube it really was disruption
My house remains a muddle plenty of mess for you to see
But I just sit and stare at it and drink my cups of tea.
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